A Gingerbread Family

Caution: Naked Gingerbread Women Ahead

I've had many blog entries in mind today. Each one of them writing themselves in my mind differently depending on my mood at the time. Believe me when I say they were largely variations and a tediously melancholy theme.

Not sure why this is. Think I just started the day badly. Not sure how though.

My lousy mood aside the day has been a lovely one full of things to be happy about.

For one my birthday present from my folks arrived just after midday in a courier van. A sleek black set of JBL Onstage II speakers. The remote control hasn't left me yet.

In an attempt to break Grumpus' hold on me I started to bake. After all any girl who's feeling down loves a good snacking session on something sweet and I do love my baking! Plus I got to try out the lovely new baking tray that we bought on the weekend.

Current Cookie Count:
- 16 raspberry jam drops
- 12 wildberry jam drops
- 28 chocolate "jam" drops
- a gingerbread family

After the delicious chicken & mushroom risotto that Gene cooked we sat around the table and decorated the gingerbread people that I'd baked earlier.



It was a wonderful way to spend time with my family. It's not something that I get to do everyday even though we're all living in the same house at the moment. We all have our own rhythms and routines and often spend our time doing our own thing but tonight we sat around the table, grabbing the various tubes of icing and made our own little family of gingerbread folk and that was the best part of the day.

I've spent a bit of time with my parents over the weekend. Driving up to Sassafras for another visit to Tea Leaves for yet another tea buying spree (this time for Dad who is now the happy owner of 500g of ceylon pekoe and 100g orange pekoe tea). Then gorging ourselves on the delicious Yarra Valley icecream (this is starting to sound like an ad for Mount Dandenong isn't it?). It was a great way to spend some time with my folks before returning to our normal routines.

So even though I'm feeling a out of sorts today I'm content in the knowledge that things will improve again and making a gingerbread family with my family was the best way to cheer me up.

Rough plans

Alarm clocks are evil. Alarm clocks going off behind locked doors more so. Grumpy this morning much. Still not sleeping well and slept in an odd position on my sore shoulder and well, it's sore!

Anyhow, it's not all grumpy grumping today. Last night I decided to cheer myself up I started working out a rough itinerary for our Europe trip so that I could leave it on the pillow for Gene to look at when he got home this morning. Wow! What a trip :)

As a rough guide, the first week will be spent in France, Paris for Christmas and visiting friends and family. The start of the second week sees us travelling South to Toulouse to connect with our train/bus to Andorra La Vella. We'll spend a couple of days there before heading to Spain to live it up in Barcelona and then possibly Ibiza (costs allowing) and then Valencia before we fly up to Britain. A week or so in England doing the family, museum, theatre thing before we start our whirlwind tour of Wales, Ireland and Scotland. From Scotland we fly to Norway where we're heading north to the Arctic Circle to see the Northern Lights. Once we've frozen ourselves we'll travel south to the The Netherlands, possibly Germany but we may not have time or cash and then a quick stop in Belgium before relaxing back in France for a few days seeing friends and family again. After we'll be on our home stretch heading back to Doha, then Singapore and then Melbourne!

This activity turned out to be a bad idea because instead of wearing out my brain it just got me excited about the trip which is possibly only 58 days away! Eek!

Detailled itinerary to follow in the next few days as we start to make bookings. We're in the process of contacting various people to arrange visits :)

Recurring Dream

My recurring bad dream of not having graduated from highschool is back. This generally spells a few days of poor sleep *sigh*. I call it a bad dream because it usually doesn't bother me too much. Last night's was almost a nightmare. I woke up feeling all stressed this morning and couldn't get back to sleep. Odd really because I had a really productive day at work and rounded off the day with a nice light meal and the last 6 chapters of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Actually there were somethings which usually make me realise it's just a dream but for some reason I didn't pick up on them so I kept dreaming/stressing. Things like the name of my maths teacher being wrong (for some reason I'm always stressed about maths. I think it's a repressed regret that I didn't drop higher maths and go to maths methods because I enjoyed the challenge). Other more obvious things like my highschool not being attached to a venue like the Victorian Arts Centre in reality... or the $7 self-service bar (stocked with all standard spirits and beers) in the back of the maths classroom. That was $7 for all the drinks you wanted in the 75 minute lesson of course. Oddly the maths class involved flicking through knitting books as well but I was really stressed about having to get good grades and pass with a really high score. Makes me wonder what's going on in my subconscious.

Yesterday I was really excited because when I checked the pidgeon holes at work there was a hand-addressed envelope with my name on it. Funny how little things like that light up your day. On closer inspection I realised that I didn't know anyone who lived at the return address... Anyhow, it turned out to be an invoice for work. On other postal related news my iPod was cleared for despatch from Sydney on Thursday. This makes me happy and frustrated all at once. After all I paid for it and the funds should have all been cleared by the end of last week. Monday at latest after the seller gave me the wrong details for the additional postage. Still, it only cleared Sydney this Thursday. I like to think of myself as a patient person but it's now been close to a week and a half since I paid for the item and the 4-5 working days that the courier is likely to take is going to be extended into at least a week if not more because Eid (three day public holiday to celebrate the end of Ramadan I think) is likely to start on Monday. Then there's another two public holidays (not sure what for) on Friday and Saturday. I'm beginning to think I should have paid the extra dosh to get Apple to send it to me...

Looking over my post today and the last few days it does occur to me that I'm a bit grumpy. I'm really not that grumpy. At least I'm quite happy about most things in my day. Just not the iPod. Or lack of sleep last night.

On a brighter note, Gene & I are about to book our flights to Paris. I just need to confirm some details at work and we should be all good. Our return to Oz from Doha has been booked. We depart Doha on 9th February and connect in Dubai for a Singapore-bound flight. We'll stay in Singapore for a few days to say hi to the folks and dream about spending money shopping there and eating all the local foods (no stomach flu for me this time!). On the 13th February we'll depart Singapore for Melbourne where we'll get to see our friends and family at some point shortly after that! Well, that's the theory anyway. My guess is that we'll land on the 14th February in which case I think we'll have a quiet Valentines day unpacking, sleeping and reacquainting ourselves with Herman.

I must admit 2006 has been an amazing year. For years I'd been saying that I wanted to head overseas to work, go to Europe etc. This year I've been lucky enough to work on two major events, one overseas and I'll be spending Christmas in Paris! What a year!

Well, I think I've managed to succeed with one New Year's resolution this year. This year certainly seems to be an improvement on last year (not that last year was terrible or anything). Now I've got 70 days to learn how to juggle three balls and I'll have completed all resolutions... :)

Retiring Grumpus

In my defence I have been meaning to post a new blog during the last week and a half but it's been getting rather busy here in Doha with plenty of things to see and do... most of them work related so unblogable (if that's a word).

Our new villa is wonderful, albeit identical the the one that I moved out of, and we've met our housemate Nevine who is also wonderful. Gene & I are in the master bedroom which is larger than our flat in Footscray was and a little smaller than our place in Brunswick East, perhaps two thirds of the size. We bought our own sheets and they are the most gorgeous cotton sheets that I've ever owned. Soft as soft stuff as Gene would say. Most importantly they're not white. This is the view from just in front of the bedroom window. The little alcove where you can see the mirror leads to our ensuite.


The view from our villa is essentially the same as the view from my last villa with a different villa number on the door.

Most excitingly since my last post it has started to cool down in Doha. The evening breezes are actually cool! Apparently even the spa-temperature-pool has cooled down. Some of the local crew have assured me that "madam will need a jacket soon!", I hope they're right.

Aside from that there's not much to report. I made choc-chip cookies and dolmades over the last week or so. I failled miserably at biryani (planning to try again with different meat and less dairy products). My work hours have changed from a day shift to a late morning-evening shift which is more productive than the day shift was. This does mean that I tend to get up in the mid-morning and run for the shuttle. The evening sees me coming home, eating, doing logic puzzles and then falling asleep before the mid-morning hits again. Less time for blogging as Opening gets closer. 54 days to go!

On the food front, Amy cooked a wonderful laksa for us on Friday night. While I'm not usually one to order a laksa at home, this was one tasty meal! She made plenty of chocolate brownies for dessert as well... I may have eaten too much again. Seems to be what I do on Fridays... eat too much... This coming weekend we're planning to try the Ramadan tent at the Ritz Carlton. It's meant to be the best tent although I've heard the Arabic music can get a bit much.

Another reason that I haven't posted recently is that Grumpus took over for awhile and peaked yesterday when I'd planned to respond to Nai, Nick & Deb's comments. Many things were making me grumpy. One of the biggest things that made me grumpy was my iPod completely dying. It's cactus. It's telling me to see the iPod support site. I did that. I tried to restore the iPod. Failled. Tried to initialise it (like the site told me to). Failled. So now I'm going to get a new one from eBay. It's brand new in a box and should be Fed-Exed to me in about three days time. For now I'm carting my laptop around with me and there's no music on the way to work.

Not wanting to finish on a grumpy note... I should mention that yesterday I received my first Arabic love letter... well it's more of a note... Nevine taught Gene how to write our names in Arabic yesterday so he's written Sarah heart Gene (read from right to left of course). How romantic :)

Speaking of which, this is the view from outside the reception of the office at dusk.

Grumpus Returns

Today is a grumpy day because I can't find my black leather belt. I know this is a trivial matter but as someone who has a great deal of trouble finding belts that are both functional and fit, I am grumpy without it. It would seem that I've lost weight so now I actually need a belt to hold my pants up and I've stupidly gone and misplaced it. Grr! I know it's in the house somewhere and I've hunted through all the rooms and all the clothes and it's just not there. It's probably staring me right in the face. Damn you belt!

Belt-blues aside though it's been an okay day today. Gorgeous Winter day in Melbourne spent bike box shopping which also resulted in the purchase of a black shirt that does up with small hooks & eyelets, a black vest with lacing up the back and a cream top to go with it. I tried to hunt for a belt that fit but the smallest I could find was a 32" belt and that's about 6-7 more inches than I need.

It's almost time to start getting ready for swing dancing which will undoubtably cheer me up. After all, it don't mean a thing if it ain't got that swing!

Slightly Stresssed

Second last day at work and it was really frustrating. I'm not going to go into detail because I've already vented twice and it gets me pretty angry just thinking about it. Suffice to say if today had run more efficiently, I wouldn't have to go back tomorrow. Just a few more hours tomorrow and it's just moving house to worry about.

Gene's got all the books, DVDs and Xbox stuff packed and ready to go and I've gotten rid of 1.5 bags of clothes already. I'm trying to be ruthless but it's happening in stages. Damn my sentimentality!

I have a pretty good t-shirt collection right now. I just got another one today from work. The Dead Set gave all the techs one of their t-shirts. They're very cool!

Tomorrow I'm buying more boxes and picking up Mum's car which should be good. Then it's down to our house and a quick look at the storage place I think. We've already filled quite a few boxes with books but we're looking to get proper packing boxes for the glassware and crockery etc. It should be good.

I must admit I'm pretty stressed about the whole moving house thing. It's more the large array of stuff that's in our bedroom really. The livingroom's just about done and the kitchen won't take long.

Can't believe we leave in 7 days... It's exciting and stressful all at once. I'll feel better once we've moved most of our stuff.

Death warmed up

Today has been less productive than planned. To be honest it isn't that unexpected. Today is my weekend. The one day in the week that I can call my own. As always I had planned to do plenty of things.

Things I Planned To Do Today
- Do at least two loads of laundry (mainly because Gene's load needs to be redone, so that's why it had to be two)
- Obtain some boxes for packing
- Actually do some packing
- Dishes, dishes and more dishes
- Clean the bathroom
- Begin the monumental task of cleaning our bedroom
- Buy Gene's birthday present (largely dependant on working out what to get him)
- Buy a ink filling device for the fountain pen that Joe gave me
- Blog
- Write in the group journal
- Sleep

There has been no progress on the boxes or the packing front today. The dishes are currently being washed but as I am in the process of making dinner, I doubt I can consider them done. Bathroom is in the same state as it was last night. I won't even bother commenting on the bedroom. Gene's birthday present is 75% purchased. I'm still hoping for a burst of enlightenment as to the coolest present to get your boyfriend. Advice is appreciated. Ink filling device has been purchased and installed. Currently blogging. Journal to follow and plenty of sleeping done.

I guess I haven't done all that badly. I'm just grumpy because I've got a head cold and I hate being sick. Besides, I can't be sick now. There's drinking to be done in just a few days! Stupid cotton wool brain.

Anyway, today while I was on the tram coming back from town I was eavesdropping on a conversation between a 22yr old arts student (she's studying ancient greek myth and dragons according to the conversation and the books she was holding) and her 9-11yr old sister. They were talking about keeping diaries and how you can read them in the future and remember past events and thoughts. I guess I wonder what it is that drives us to write down our thoughts, ideas and memories. I have a blog (or two if you want to be picky), a paper journal (black, unlined) and a group journal. The paper journal is for me and me alone. It is my attempt at writing without self-censorship. It's a safe haven for my thoughts and feelings that are too raw for me to be able to share with anyone. My blog(s) are for me but they're also for my friends. I like being able to share my day with my friends. Particularly as I work silly hours and never seem to be able to catch up with them. Even with all these forms of diary/journal keeping, I'm still not sure what it is that drives me to keep them. I think it's largely to do with my inability to sort out my thoughts just in my head. I've always found it easier to put them on paper and then it seems to make sense. I think it's also because I like to write and it's nice to share that with other people.

Dinner and my ever wonderful boyfriend are calling.

People suck sometimes

Fuck it pisses me off when people don't stop for injured animals or animals in danger it really does.

Nick, Matt and I were having a lovely picnic in the gardens across from the Arts Centre when we saw a dog roaming the park. Naturally as we had food there we were hoping the dog would not be coming to make friends with us just yet and just ignored it and carried on with our conversation. Moments later we hear a loud bang and turn to see the blue heeler ricocheting off the bonnet of a silver car with a yelp as it was pushed to the centre of the busy road. The car sped off while the cars behind attempted to brake and miss the dog. A few onlookers jumped up and one of the girls and I made it to the road. She picked up the dog (who was yelping in pain and struggling to stand) moved her to the side of the road in the shade. I called the animal hospital who then put me on to the Lost Dogs Home ambulance who came as soon as they could. It just really pissed me off that the person driving the car didn't even come back. It shits me that someone could leave another living creature for dead in the middle of the busy road. Sure it's traumatic being the driver and knowing you've hit someone but how the fuck can you live with yourself knowing that you didn't stop to render assistance? Even the lady in the car in front of the car that hit the dog came back to check on the dog as she'd seen it all in her rearview mirror. It just makes me angry. There wasn't much in the way of external injury. A little bleeding from the front right dew claw and a little where the abdomen meets the hind legs. Nothing was visibly broken but I'm fairly sure that the hind legs took a fair brunt of the force of the car. It was amazing that she was still alive really. I'm getting all angry thinking about this again. We (Nick, a somewhat goth couple of girls and I) sat with her until the ambulance came (flashing lights and all) and then slid her onto the makeshift gurney and carried her to the car. The poor thing was not impressed with the move as it obviously pained her. She was in shock and I think the last thing that she wanted to see was another dog but there was a dog in another section of the station wagon/ambulance. In true fighting style she picked herself up as much as she could and dragged herself to the other end of the car and tried to sit up but ended up just curling up into a ball. I hope she's okay and I hope she has a home to go to. It's silly I know, but I'm going to call tomorrow and just see how she is. I guess it's closure for me.

Besides, Gene and my family can testify that I'm always the first to get someone to pull over in a car and help get dogs or cows off the road. If reincarnation exists I hope that someone will help me if I'm a scared creature that somehow found myself in the midst of loud fast scary big things. Grr people.

The whole affair put a dampener on things but Nick was wonderful and came back with hot drinks which were nice and soothing. We ended up lazing in the park watching a little girl play with a bubble gun and later a family strolling through the gardens with bright parasols. It was just what I needed after the late night last night. A little sunshine and (relatively) fresh air is good for the soul really.

We headed back to Matt's where we finished the night talking about theatre and shows we've seen/worked on/want to do. Then we watched Matt's version of Gypsy complete with director's commentary and fast-forwarding. It was great although I really wish I'd gotten to see it live.

It never ceases to amaze me what Matt can do with a show. It's always a challenge and always a fantastic learning experience working with him. Admittedly I've only worked with him once but he brings out the best in people and his craftsmanship in storytelling... I just don't know how to describe it but it feels right. I look forward to working with him again.

I keep thinking about what I'm going to do when my contract with the Games finishes and the thought of not having something to move onto is stressing me somewhat but I guess I need to work out what I want to do and chase that. There are just so many things that I want to do. I need to focus.

Every year I want to build on my skills and well I hope I can actually do it this year. I want to understand better how theatre is put together. In a similar way to writers looking at the forms of writing and various structures involved in writing, I want to get a better understanding of the elements that go together to put on a good show and how they work. I don't need to be a master of all trades, I just want to understand and try. It's a challenge but I think it'll make me better at what I do. I think everyone should get out there and challenge themselves to do something that they wouldn't normally do every now and then. It's refreshing!

I guess even though I didn't really do much other than relax all day it feels like it's been a long day. The whole incident with the dog really took it out of me. I think I was feeling stressed because I felt helpless. I couldn't do much to help the dog who was obviously distressed and in pain. She couldn't tell me what bits hurt and how she felt. She could just lie there. I felt helpless because I couldn't help her and I was angry that the person who had caused the pain didn't stop. I was angry because they had placed this creature in this position, even though it wasn't intentional, and hadn't even given a damn what happened to it. It made me very angry.

Tomorrow is a new day and I will still probably be angry but I'm not going to let it take over my life. I will continue to stop and help where I can because frankly that's just the kind of person I am. I guess I am a little idealistic and seem to think that most people would act the same way. Silly me.

People suck sometimes.

Less Grumpus

Less grumpy now but very tired. Also slightly less sick which is nice. Managed to ditch the fever and trade it for a rather annoying cough. Yay!

Have discovered that my idea of 5ml and what 5ml actually amounts to in "spoon" quantities is vastly different... Did you know that a tablespoon is almost 15mL? Who'd a thunk it. Anyway have stopped taking quite so much cough syrup and moved on to the heavy duty cold and flu capsules at the recommendation of the chemist. It must be exciting because he took my name and address before he'd sell it. Well... okay that's just because it had pseudoephedrine (sp?) in it.

Pleasantville was good and I'm looking forward to watching the two DVDs that we bought yesterday when Gene gets back. I'll elaborate on them some other day.

It's been a long day but a good one. I wish I didn't have this stupid cold. It's just very inconvenient. I'd be willing to book it in around the first of April but that may yet change.

Gene's safely in Adelaide and probably in the pub already :)

So in the happy knowledge that my boyfriend is alive and well, I'm going to head off to bed.

Grumpus

Tonight I'm grumpy and feeling rather sorry for myself. Don't say I didn't warn you.

As per my usual excellent timing, mere days before what could be the busiest three-four weeks of my life, I have managed to get sick. Despite having told myself it is nothing but a mere throat infection (the kind that just sees me lose my voice but generally function regardless) I have had to come to terms with the idea that it is perhaps a little more than that. The wheezing sensation in my upper chest combined with the rapidly rising fever (which the panadol has stopped combatting) is leading me to believe that tomorrow may be a swift trip to the doctor. Argh! Why now? I've been looking forward to these few weeks for months now!

Gene's been wonderful today though, he dropped me off at work and then he took me to get some cough mixture (which is surprisingly yummy) and then went to the video store to get some videos to watch. So far we've watched Mr & Mrs Smith which wasn't as bad as everyone made it out to be. Sure it's not the deepest of plots or most profound characters, but it was kind of cute and well chosen for my brain capacity at present. We're about two thirds of the way through Pleasantville but Gene's been hijacked my Nomes and Lisa to go drinking. I guess we'll finish watching it tomorrow some time.

Aside from getting sick I've been having a great time working hard and I'm still looking forward to the big days ahead. I can't believe it's only a matter of weeks away. I'm really excited and damn it I will be healthy for this experience!

Victorian Have A Crap Day

I think I've finally had to admit to myself that it's not just my hayfever playing up but my stupid throat infection is most definitely back. I was trying to tell myself that this most definitely wasn't the case, despite having flirted with the idea yesterday. However I spent most of last night napping in between coughing fits.

A few people at work asked if I was dying over at my desk and I may have coughed out "I'm apparently giving it a red hot shot". It's hard to remember. The cough medicine isn't working. I've tried the Chinese random black syrupy stuff and the pharmacy's cough syrup. I'm still coughing and now I'm grumpy. It hurts to cough. Stupid dry coughs. For once I'm trying to be mature about it. I'm actually going to see the doctor tomorrow. Admittedly tomorrow afternoon so that I can still attend all my meetings during the morning and early afternoon, but still... at least I'm going.

It's a pity I'm feeling grumpy and unwell. The weather was lovely today and it's set to change tomorrow night if the weather bureau is accurate.

Based on Naomi's post and some of the people at work it would seem that I wasn't the only one who was feeling grumpy though, hence the title of this post.

On a geekier note... Today I went to Officeworks with a couple of guys from work and they had this great USB keypad that works as a calculator on its own. VERY COOL! As someone who touch-types and does data entry, it's the only thing that my laptop is missing.

Gene called to say that he's bought food to make dinner but he's gone to the pub to welcome home one of his best friends who's just returned from a trip to Europe. He wanted me to come down and meet them I think but I don't really want to cough all over everyone - like I did at work... I think I'll just make some food, shower and probably head to bed. I can't believe I'm thinking of going to bed at 19:05... I haven't done that since I was working at the call centre... Stupid cough.

Wallowing

Today has been a little emotionally challenging and for once I seem to be soothing my day with a delicious icy cold glass of Bailey's & milk - even though I can't really drink much milk and I'm feeling kinda cold.

It started off as most days have lately, a struggle to wake up and not feel exhausted. I've decided that when I eventually get back to being able to fall asleep at night my moods should settle down. I'm also trying to get some more exercise because that usually perks people up too.

I ended up jumping out of bed pretty excited because today's my first day back at uni. I logged into all of my subjects and read the course guidelines and I'm even a week ahead for the legal framework readings. Admittedly that's because Week 1's reading was about how to study so I felt an urge to get a bit of a headstart considering I'll probably be behind for Myth in the Ancient World because I've got to get the textbook sent from SA. I called most of the bookshops in Melbourne this morning in an attempt to get a copy of said textbook but to no avail. I'm quietly confident that I'll do well with Legal Framework. It's kind of exciting. Always had a vague interest in law.

I even achieved my task list for today, lodging our tax returns and cleaning Herman's cage. Herman's a little confused because his cage usually smells faintly of citrus after it's been cleaned but we've changed to a vanilla scented cleaner as it's "food safe" and less strong smelling. It was exciting today when he let me pick him up without too much fuss. He's a good rat that one. I think he's having fun re-decorating his new hammock. He'd chewed the back out of the old one that Mum made him. I don't think she'll be thrilled.

So why am I melancholy? Of the three of us who applied for a tech job I'm the only one without an interview. I'm really happy for my friends but as I don't have much to fill my days at the moment I'm feeling a little down. Doesn't help that they're both boys and I always feel exceedingly female when applying for tech jobs. Anyhow I've decided to indulge my wallowing in disappointment for tonight and tonight only. Tomorrow it's all smiles and moving forward. I'm definitely going to go for my first aid again and test and tag as soon as my tax return comes in. I'm going to be the best damn tech that I can be and I know that I can get a job doing so. Failing that I'll work towards my own theatre and make my own work.

Well, I'm going to make the most of my wallowing time :)

Luke Warm

I started watching Angels in America last night and got all the way to chapter 2 when the DVD froze. It was struggling a bit with layer changes but then it just refused to work. I've now watched half of chapter to a x32 speed at least three times. It's still quite a pretty watch then. I suppose that started a bit of a trend after that.

This morning when Gene got up to have a shower he came back to say the water was great for a couple of minutes before it died down to cold water and never heated up again. I tested this theory and found that while I didn't get cold water it was just luke-warm again. I'm hoping the day improves.

I was going to get my next textbook, or at least try today, but have decided to hold off till Monday due to financial reasons (namely my banking transfer didn't work and I need to get petrol for tonight). I'm not too fussed though. I'm sure the State Library of Victoria will have a copy of it somewhere.

It's funny how I don't really feel down but reading through my post so far it's coming across that I am. I'm feeling apathetic today so I suppose that's what's coming across.

Anyhow, I'll write later when I've done some stuff. I'm accutely aware that a trip to the bank is required today and time is of the essence.

I'm Beginning to See the Light

Today was just one of those days. It's hard to tell whether it was just my disinclination (if that's a word) to get out of bed this morning that just set the tone for the rest of the day, or whether it was always destined to turn out the way it did.

It wasn't a bad day, but it wasn't great either. One of those non-days really!

I had the client double-jack with me today at work and I was having a rather rotten dialing day. Too many wrong numbers to make it feel good! The pasta was good at work though. I was originally going to make food tonight for work tomorrow but I forgot and just had steak and vegies instead. I'm defrosting some mince so that I can make either pasta sauce or chilli con carne tomorrow... I haven't decided yet!

Swing dancing was good tonight although I missed Gene immensely when social dancing started. I stayed for a short while, had a dance with a couple of the guys there and then headed home. I just don't feel like myself today!

For that matter, I haven't really been myself for at least a week. I'm getting quite insular. I can feel myself sliding into a secluded world where I start to wallow in my own thoughts. It's not good! Thinking can be good... wallowing is less good. I am starting to get a bit better though. I'm happy that I can at least recognise that I'm getting in a bad way and I am making and effort to halt the downward spiral.

My eyes are dim, but I can see... but I have not got my specs with me... on that note I end.

The Yellow Brick Road

Wow. I can't believe how down I've been getting in the last week. I've been grumpy most days and it only picks up slightly every now and then. I don't think it's work either. It's this feeling of being housebound. I hate it!

I just want to get back to my place where I can just walk down the road and see people. Or jump on my bike and head to the park or to the city. I want to be able to come home and know that I'm in my own home and everything I want is there and not have to worry about having to cart it around with me, just in case...

The first couple of weeks were good and I've really enjoyed watching TV at home... I've been able to gorge myself on "Will & Grace" for the last few weeks. I'll miss that! The dogs are a little too jumpy for my liking... or more accurately their claws are just so long! I'd trim them but I'm not particularly good with that and I'd probably just cause them pain... I remember Ziggy had a fear of nail clippers for good reason.

I'm really loving the cable internet and I'll definitely miss that more than anything else! It's great to be able to just jump on whenever I want to and be able to get everything I need quickly. I just feel more efficient :)

It's not long to go now though. Just a few more days.

I think the carnival is over. I'm ready to return to Kansas.

More Swinging

I had a good day today, but for some reason I'm rather grumpy. I didn't really notice it until I was driving and the people trying to overtake me on the left from the bike lane really got to me. Maybe I'm more tired that I'm letting myself believe.

At the moment I'm content to blame it on having to start work again tomorrow. I'm shifting back into reality and I'm not liking it! I'm missing my city lifestyle more and more each day as I shift back into my usual lifestyle. The only difference being I'm now living a forty minute drive from where I need to be as opposed to a fifteen minute bike/tram ride. Not long to go now...

I ended up heading back into town today to catch up with Gene and Claire to go to Summer in the Park at the Fitzroy Gardens. It was good fun and the free lesson was the same as yesterday's so it was like a quick revision. The uneven ground was a bit different, but it was great to watch all the Swing Patrol's dancers when they performed! Gene's really keen on improving so that he can learn to do aerial work. There's a particular favourite of his where the follow goes over the lead's shoulder. So we're going to another class tomorrow - I'll be sprinting from work - and then there's a second class on Thursday at a different place.

It's a bit like the Speigeltent left our lives and I've replaced it with swing dancing... I guess the music's pretty similar. I'm just more sober at the swing dancing but having an equally good time!

My eyes are tired and I've got no idea where my glasses are. I can only assume they're in Brunswick. I'll have to get back there early tomorrow and have a good hunt.

On that note, I'm off again, hopefully to sleep. If not I'll keep reading "The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night" by Mark Haddon. It's proving quite an interesting read! Lighter reading than "Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell" by Susanna Clark which I'm also quite enjoying at the moment. Highly recommend both books!